


Desperado

by BagedGels



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Based off a song, Hisoka talks like a waffle house waitress, How Do I Tag, I Don't Even Know, I didn't take credit for it, I try my best to write psychopaths, Illumi's dreams are weird, No Nen AU, Other, Rihanna is great, Would I get sued for that, Wtf am I doing, gore? I guess?, other tags might be added as the story goes, wtf are these tags
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-21
Updated: 2021-02-22
Packaged: 2021-03-17 18:54:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,081
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29597238
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BagedGels/pseuds/BagedGels
Summary: Hisoka and Illumi meet at your stereotypical diner in the middle of nowhere. Illumi is an assassin from a well known family of elite assassins and Hisoka is...there?I'm not the best at descriptions but this basically is me seeing how well I can write different types of characters.
Comments: 5
Kudos: 2





	1. Desperado

**Author's Note:**

> Desperado  
> Sittin' in an old Monte Carlo  
> A man whose heart is hollow  
> Mhm, take it easy  
> I'm not tryna go against yuh  
> Actually, I'm goin' witcha
> 
> Gotta get up out of here  
> And yuh ain't leavin' me behind  
> I know you won't cause we share common interests  
> You need me, there ain't no leaving me behind  
> Never, no, no, I just want outta here, yeah  
> Once I'm gone, ain’t no going back
> 
> If you want, we can be runaways  
> Running from any sight of love  
> Yeah, yeah, there ain’t nothin'  
> There ain't nothin' here for me  
> There ain't nothin' here for me anymore  
> But I don't wanna be alone
> 
> Desperado  
> Sitting on your ole' Monte Carlo  
> We've both had our hearts broke  
> Unh, hunh, take it easy  
> I'm not tryna go against yuh  
> I can be a lone wolf witcha
> 
> Gotta get up out of here  
> And you ain't leaving me behind  
> I know you won't cause we share common interests  
> You need me, there ain't no leaving me behind  
> Never, no, no, both want outta here, yeah  
> Once we're gone, ain’t no going back
> 
> If you want, we can be runaways  
> Running from any sight of love  
> Yeah, yeah, there ain’t nothin'  
> There ain't nothin' here for me  
> There ain't nothin' here for me anymore  
> But I don't wanna be alone
> 
> Dear desperado  
> Yeah, I don't wanna be alone  
> Dear desperado  
> Yeah, I don't wanna be alone
> 
> If you want, we can be runaways  
> Running from any sight of love  
> Yeah, yeah, there ain’t nothin'  
> There ain't nothin' here for me  
> There ain't nothin' here for me anymore  
> But I don't wanna be alone
> 
> Yeah-yeah-ah  
> Yeah-yeah-ah  
> Yeah-yeah-ah  
> Yeah-yeah-ah  
> Yeah-yeah-ah  
> Yeah-yeah-ah
> 
> SONG: Desperado, Rihanna
> 
> https://youtu.be/aD6pjhFOjFM

~*~

1

Hisoka sipped the warm liquid from his mug. It was hotter than Johnny Depp outside, but here he was drinking hot chocolate. On top of it being at least one hundred degrees, he was in the middle of a desert. There was barely anything for miles other than dry land and the occasional cactus. "I should get some water too..." He thought to himself.

The sound of a bell loudly chimed throughout the, mostly empty, diner. The creek of the rusted door hinges sounding over the faint sound of 'Stand by Me' playing from the worn out speakers caused Hisoka to glance over at who was entering from the corner of his eyes. "What can I get you, sweetheart?" The waitress' deep southern accent filled the quiet diner. "Just water." 

"Coming right up." The waitress walked around to the corner, grabbing a blue plastic cup, then coming back with the cup filled with water. "You definitely don't look like you're from around here." Hisoka smiled at the stranger, who paid no mind to him. The other man simply drank from his cup and looked on at the wall. "Not much of a talker are you?" The stranger continued to completely ignore Hisoka's attempts at making a conversation.

Sighing, Hisoka decided to put more effort into the man's appearance rather than trying to get an unwanted conversation out. His long silk like black hair poured down his shoulders, flowing down to the middle of his back. Though he didn't look bad in it, his outfit choice wasn't the best fit for being in the middle of a dry deserted nowhere land. "Why wear a black turtleneck in hundred degree heat?" 

"Oh so that gets a reaction out of you?"

The stranger had turned his head towards Hisoka, staring blankly at him. His big black eyes were cold and empty, nearly making Hisoka shiver just looking at them. They seemed like, instead of the irises that should be there, spells and words of negativity that gave off complete darkness swirled around in his eyes. His deathly pale skin resembles that of a lifeless porcelain doll sitting on an empty shelf in a room of shadows, never getting sunlight and cursed to sit there forever. Hisoka smirked. 

"Well, hello sunshine."

The man continued to blankly stare at him, with no plan on responding in any other way. "You know, you have a beautiful smile, has anyone ever told you that?" Hisoka leaned towards the man, resting his chin on his palm. Hisoka continued to speak, but the conversation was completely one sided, the other man's expression unchanging. Eventually, the man stood up with one swift movement, his hair flowing off his shoulders. He placed down a five dollar bill and began walking out the old diner. 

"You know-" The man stopped and turned around, once again blankly staring at the redhead. "You aren't going to get many friends without talking, sunshine." Hisoka smiled and the man walked away. 

\---

Hisoka walked down the old, dirty steps of the motel he had checked into earlier that day. Once he reached the lobby he stopped, seeing a familiar head of long silk black hair. "Here are your keys." The woman behind the worn down counter handed the man his room keys. Long after the man had gone to his room, Hisoka walked up to the front desk. "Oh, Hisoka! How are you?" The woman behind the counter combed her hair behind her ear. "Hey, darling! I would love to chat, but do you mind telling me the room number of the long haired man you just gave a room to? I saw him at a diner earlier and he dropped this." He held up a black wallet. "I wanted to give it back to him."

"Oh, that's sweet of you! He's in room 301." Disappointment was clear in her voice, but she was too charmed by Hisoka's 'kindness' to say much. "Thank you, honey! I promise we'll talk later." He smiled and blew her a kiss, making her swoon.

~-~

The wooden room door swung open and the same set of dead black eyes stared daggers at Hisoka's soul. "How did you find me?"

"You know, sunshine, this is the first time you've spoken to me in the entire day we've met. You should really talk more, you have such a kind way of words and you're very patient." 

"I won't ask again." Hisoka held up a black wallet, waving it around and smirked. "The lovely older woman at the front desk may have a little crush on me, so it was easy to get your room number." Hisoka, once again, found the not-so-stranger's dark abyss of eyes staring at him. "What do you want?" Hisoka smiled and swiftly made his way through the door. "I want to know what a man like you is doing in the middle of nowhere." He sat down on the dirty bed, crossing his legs. "I don't think anyone would try this hard just to find that out, unless you want to kill me." Hisoka gasped, trying to sound like he was hurt. "Why would I do such a thing? But I'm sure you wouldn't see that as an effective way to kill, isn't that right, Illumi Zoldyck?" He smirked. 

"Put the gun down, I mean no harm!" Hisoka put his hands up in surrender, but Illumi didn't back down. "Ok, I see you don't believe me-"

"How do you know my name?" 

"That makes a good point-"

"Answer my question." Hisoka sighed and forcefully pushed the gun down. "You signed your name on the check in sheet, bright as day, not that hard for anyone to find out." Illumi glared down at him. "I put a fake name."

"I do my research. It was a scrambled version of your name, it was enough to fool the woman at the front desk. I would've expected you to try harder, knowing the family you come from-"

"I will kill you right here."

"It would be an honor to be killed by you, truly, but I don't plan on dying just yet." Hisoka stood up from the bed. Illumi obviously stayed cautious, keeping the gun at his forehead. "Besides, you wouldn't kill me, with the nosy neighbor you have across the hall you couldn't."

"I'll ask you one more time, what do you want?" 

"I'll ask _you_ one more time, what is a man like you doing in the middle of nowhere?"

With widened eyes, the woman who serviced Illumi and Hisoka at the front desk placed a quiet hand over her mouth and quickly left back to her desk. She was going to head to Hisoka's room to ask about the wallet he held up. After he left to the other man's room, and the effects of his charming smile wore off, she took a moment to think and remember; 

_'That man had his wallet checking in, so whose wallet did Hisoka have?'_

"Meteor City Police Station, what seems to be the issue?" 

"Yes, hello. I'm a motel worker and there's two suspicious men that checked in earlier, I just walked in on them having an argument with fire arms brought in and I thought it would be best to contact the police." 

"Alright ma'am, can you tell me more information on them?"

"Of course."

_'Sorry, Hisoka. You're a charming fellow but there's something off....and I feel like I've seen that other man before.'_

\---

"You know, when you invited me along I didn't expect for you to so graciously allow me into your car." Illumi turned his head towards the other man, giving him another one of his famous empty stares. 

Except irritation took up most of his expression. 

"I know, I know what you're gonna say, 'I didn't let you into my car, you forced yourself in' but that wouldn't make you seem like a good friend." Hisoka crossed his legs in the slightly worn out passenger seat of his new found "friend's" Monte Carlo. "Yeah, yeah we aren't friends, I get. But Illu dear- don't look at me like that." Hisoka sighed. "Remember what I said last night?" 

"So you're running away?" 

"I never said that." Illumi said, standing still put strongly in front of the strange and pestering man. "Well, that's what it sounded like." Illumi blankly blinked at him. "Why are you so defensive anyways? Can't you tell I'm not your enemy?" 

"What are you then? Other than a waste of my time?" Hisoka laughed at that and attempted to pat Illumi's shoulder.

Note attempted to if Hisoka hadn't pulled away fast enough, his arm would've been broken. 

"I'm just someone in a similar situation." A thin black eyebrow raised on Illumi's pale face. "I'm also a runaway-"

"That's not what I am, and there is no we."

"Ouch."

"I'm not your enemy, so relax Lumi and drive." Illumi's eye twitched and even though he was one hundred percent against the idea of having this stranger drive around with him, he started up the car and drove down the empty road going miles ahead. 

"Oh I love this song!" Hisoka turned up the radio, and sang along to some random poppy song that came across the radio. 

This continued for at least an hour before the car came to an abrupt halt, causing Hisoka to slightly fall forward. "What the fuck?" Illumi looked at the man glaring back at him. "If you say one more lyric or hum another melody, I will strap you to the ground and run you over." 

"He speaks!"

"I **will** kill you." 

~*~


	2. Just a dream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ha ha music reference fune
> 
> Gore in this chapter, I guess? Technically? Just be mindful if you don't like it or it makes you uncomfortable I'd request you to stop reading.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyway forget what I said about posting the next chapter in a couple days, next day since I had a couple things to do.

"Hey sunshine, I have a quick question for you." Illumi continued to bluntly ignore him, taking a granola bar from off the shelf. "Where are you driving to?" Illumi's black hair swayed slightly as he halted. "You don't know where you're going, do you?" Illumi turned to glare at him. "You're a terrible runaway." Hisoka sighed and dropped his Cosmic Brownie and raspberry tea on the dirty Gas station counter. "That's not what I am." Illumi gave the cashier some money, picked up his water and granola bar and began walking out the door. Hisoka grabbed his own snacks and pushed through the door. "Look, Yorknew city is a few miles away. It should take a couple days to get there, but after this stop there's only one other Gas station and the rest is deserted land. So, I suggest we get whatever need then." Illumi closed the car door and drank from his water bottle. 

"How did you even end up in Meteor City anyways, sunshine? It isn't exactly an ideal vacation spot." Hisoka took a bite from his brownie and crossed his legs. "You ask too many questions." The car began to move forward and silence poured over the two. 

"You know, you keep saying that, but you haven't thrown me out. Why is that? You don't seem like the person to keep useless people around." Hisoka looked over at Illumi, whose focus was entirely on the empty road ahead of him. He was still listening, regardless if he wanted to or not. "Is it because I'm not useless to you, Illumi dear?" Hisoka leaned in and twirled a strip of Illumi's black hair around his finger. "Whatever reason you came here for, you needed someone who knew where they were going for you to get somewhere. If you hadn't you'd probably would've kept driving around until you reached the split road, with a chance of taking riding on a one way road to a cliff, since there is no sign showing the way to the city." Hisoka smiled up at the soulless eyes looking down at him. They looked like they had gotten bigger than they were before, but not bigger because he was happy about Hisoka clawing at his hair. 

"So, you need me. That's why you haven't thrown me out." Illumi gripped the steering wheel, nearly breaking it, and looked back at the road. 

"Once I get where I need to be, I'm killing you."

"Uh-huh, sure Hun."

\---

"Are those the guys you were talking about?" The gas station clerk spoke from behind the counter. "Yes! Perfect description. Did they say where they were heading too?"

"Actually.." He turned towards the door window then back at the counter. "No. They were talking about not knowing where they were going, a big help, right?" The woman on the other end sighed. "It's alright, we'll figure something out."

\---

"Hey, hey! I said that was the last stop, you just missed it!" Hisoka hissed at Illumi and turned to the back of the car window to see a lone small and run down gas station sliding back behind them. "Getting to where I need to be as soon as possible is the goal. There is not much time for stopping." 

"Look, Doll-" Hisoka turned back into his seat and sighed. "-why are you in such a hurry? Isn't the thrill of being a runaway the journey rather than the destination?" Hisoka sang.

"I'm not in anything other than a car, that is made to get from point A to point B, with a joke of a man that doesn't know how to shut his mouth." Hisoka narrowed his eyes at the other man and formed his lips into a small pout. "Now you're just being rude."

Next thing they knew it, day turned into night and yet again with nothing but road and dry land ahead of them. What a bright future. Hisoka looked up at the foggy night sky, and took a moment. With the clouds taking up most of the sky, there was barely any way to see what planets and stars were blinking with light at night. "Beautiful night, isn't it, Sunshine?" 

"I suppose." 

"What's on your mind?"

"You ask as if you genuinely want to know rather than force a conversation out of me." Hisoka's sly smile gleamed even in the darkness of Illumi's car. "Oh, dear. You caught me, but I would like to know what goes on behind those-" A sharp claw-like nail pressed high on Illumi's cheek, directly under his hypnotic eyes. "-bright eyes of yours. You didn't try to stab me, so it looks like you're open for a conversation." 

Illumi looked up for a split second at the clouded sky and slowly blinked. "Ah, you're a star gazer? I enjoy the clouds more myself, there's just something calming about the same three shades of grey mixed with fading white and knowing this is the last of the peace we will have right before it unleashes beautifully tragic weather patterns. The calm before the storm, some may say, but it's more knowing of the destruction to come and watching it unfold with the uneasiness and calmness of this grand disaster swirling around all at once." Illumi's expression and eyes did not move or change from the same blank face staring at the road ahead of them, but he was listening. "They remind me of your bright eyes, darling." Hisoka turns to Illumi, giving him a smile. "I wonder how many people have been under your storm, love?"

\---

Breathe

Keep breathing

Illumi's dark eyelashes slowly creaked open, ignoring the sorrowful voice telling him to breathe, he silently stared up. 

'Blank.'

He slowly inhaled and realized he was laying in a sea of still water that rested over his cheeks. 

He blinked a few more times before slowly sitting up. 

'Blank.'

Illumi stared ahead of him, again greeted with nothing but what he would guess was a white wall. 'Was I captured?' Illumi looked down at the pool of cool water and cupped the water with his right hand. Then he noticed, 'These aren't my clothes.' He was wearing a black and white tuxedo, one that he didn't remember putting on or buying. 

He swiftly turned his head, watching the ends of his hair float behind him in the prestige water. The contrast of his hair and the water seemed so natural to him, it didn't make any sense. 

Nothing in this place made sense. 

Illumi stood up and looked down at the still water rumble from his movement. 'Even dress shoes. That clown didn't drug me, did he?' Would Hisoka drug him after all he's done? He seemed set on getting Illumi to Yorknew. He also seemed like a liar.

Drip

Illumi shook himself out of his thoughts and listened to the tap of something dripping into the water. Whatever it was, it was close. He looked around in every direction, but it was all the same. 

'Blank.'

'Blank.'

Then he noticed the water turning a scarlet red and looked down. 

Drip

'Me?'

Illumi's hands rested at his sides and were covered in crimson red that anyone would guess was blood. Seeing this did not startle him whatsoever, it was nothing new. Blood that fit onto his hand like a glove, along with the stains almost never coming off like a tattoo. 

Blood never worried him, especially not his own.

The water only seemed to get murkier with the thick dark red, and Illumi brought a hand up to his chest. He could almost stick his hand through the gash in it, where had this came from? It wasn't there before. 

A loud splash and a rotten stench from far behind him caused Illumi to turn around and stare in the direction of the sound. 'What is this?' Another loud splash, much closer this time, sounded and Illumi quickly jumped away from the noise. Illumi stood still as a calming silence washed over the entire area, besides the steady dripping of the blood from his hands, the only noise he could hear was his own uneven breathing. 

He squinted at the direction of the last splash, and watched a large object float closer to him. Whatever it was, it was still submerged under the water and it smelled horrible, the closer it got the more the rotten stench grew.

Illumi looked up and noticed the blank "walls" were now dripping(?) with a hazy red. The Zoldyck would've guessed it was blood as well, if it didn't look more like gas. Yes, gas. Red gas dripping down a hauntingly white wall like blood. 

The object hit his ankle. Cold, rubbery skin hit his ankle and It felt like a creature was shedding, or petting a hairless cat with a few strands of fur. 

Whatever it was, it was rotting.

Illumi slowly brought his head down to the object then shifted his eyes down.

'A corpse, that makes sense.'

It looked as though it was still somewhat alive, but it had lost ninety percent of the hair it had and only had two limbs left. 

A loud, heavy, drum banged out of nowhere and Illumi looked back up, only to see more and more corpses dropping one by one from the blood-gas walls. 

He stepped over the corpse that had floated close to him, watched and listened to the intense rhythm of the drum banging with every steady splash of foggy water going up from around his body.

'What is this?'

Slowly, the room began to turn cold. The drum only played louder, the bodies only fell faster and Illumi stood in the middle of it all.

He looked straight up, and saw a mirror. It fell down perfectly in front of him, but it wasn't even a full mirror. Not one that you would see in bathrooms or ones you would see in store dressing rooms, it was a rear-view mirror. It wasn't attached to anything, it simply floated in the air in front of him.

Illumi looked over his reflection; standing not too far behind, what looked like his Monte Carlo, in a forest with plush trees and grass that looked turquoise in the night of the woods. 

He was in this horridly smelling area, what was this?

Suddenly the drums stopped, the corpses stopped dropping, the gas stopping flowing; everything stilled. 

Illumi let go of a breath he had no idea he was holding, and the blood water froze over.

He stared into his own empty eyes in the rearview mirror and his vision glitched. 

Standing in the middle of the woods, the only thing behind him being tall trees and darkness, Illumi watched a single black balloon stuck in the hand of his mirror self. Then thousands of maggots cowered at his feet and covered him completely.

His eyes shot open.

"Well, good morning my dearest Snow White!"

'A dream?'

Illumi looked up at Hisoka, who was smiling down at him with a takeout box of pancakes in his hands. "Did you drug me, clown?"

Hisoka sighed and placed the box on the dashboard. "I can't believe you have such little trust in me! Honestly, Illu darling-"

"Illumi."

"-you should try and start trusting me. You fell asleep and I took over driving the rest of the way, it wouldn't be such a good idea for the driver to be sleeping right? I don't plan on dying yet." Hisoka opened a can of Sunkist and handed Illumi a water bottle, which he put to the side immediately because he still did not fully trust the man. "Fine then, stay thirsty."

"Did you not think to wake me once it was morning?"

"Darling, it's eight AM, calm down. Plus, you look so precious when you aren't plotting my murder!"

Illumi ignored that last part and sat up from the leaned back passenger's seat. "Where and when did you find a place for food?" Taking the takeout box from the dashboard he opened it and looked down at six light brown fluffy pancakes. 

"Oh. We're in Yorknew, darling! Around the Outskirts, but we're here." Hisoka flashed the other man a sly smile and stabbed the top pancake in the box with his white plastic fork.

Illumi turned his eyes to the car window, they were parked in a forest. A strange sense of familiarity hovered over Illumi's thoughts, tall plush trees and flourishing green grass. He wondered what this forest would look like at night. 

"Are you not going to eat anything?" Hisoka was on his third pancake once he asked this. Illumi turned to look at the man then down at the takeout box. "Hm."

\---

"So you weren't joking about killing me, huh?" Hisoka looked down at Illumi's hand, firm on his chin, and switched his eyes to Illumi's emotionless face in the mirror. 

"You are no longer of use to me." Illumi deadpanned. "Are you afraid I'll share your identity, darling? Why would I do such a thing?" Even with a smirk on his face a bead of sweat rolled down the side of his face; Nervous.

"Why wouldn't you?" 

"We're friends darling!" 

Illumi stilled for a moment. The harshness in his eyes softened and he looked directly into Hisoka's golden eyes in the bathroom mirror.

"Friends?"

"Yes, doll." The tension in Hisoka's shoulders loosened and he looked at Illumi with a fond smile. 

"Friends are only a stepping stone that will wither away after enough usage. I have used you enough." And with one swift movement Illumi snapped his neck and watched his body gracefully fall to the dirty tile flooring. 

He turned to walk away but stopped, looked down and grabbed Hisoka's corpse by his fake red hair. "This is for lowering me to such an idiotic thing as 'friendship'." Illumi tugged on Hisoka's hair and with a pop and snapped his head off his shoulders.

After disposing of Hisoka's body, Illumi spent the rest of the evening searching for a decent place to stay and planned his next steps. As he closed the door of his motel room he took the time to look through Yorknew City's catalogs. 

_"Where are you driving to? You're a terrible runaway."_ Hisoka's irritatingly smug voice rang in the back of his mind as he flipped through the pages. 

He wasn't a runaway. He was on a mission. A personal one, which was a rare thing. But it wasn't necessarily that either, he had unfinished business with a particular gang leader that had a large possibility of being in Yorknew. No, it wasn't a grudge he held against the man nor was it something of just wanting to see him. 

There was something the gang leader knew that the Zoldyck did not, and all Illumi was aware of was that it was extremely important. 

"What are you hiding from me, Chrollo?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading I'll probably be back in a few days or later today to post the next chapter I really like writing this so might be later today.


	3. I'll Hurt You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Illumi goes out to continue the mission he set out to do in the first place, but it doesn't go as planned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi 
> 
> Yeah the chapter name was also based on a song.
> 
> I'll Hurt You- Busta Ryhmes Ft. Eminem  
> https://youtu.be/WgEtUuEK-to

A casino. That's where Chrollo and his gang were going to be. 

It seemed as though the pockets of every gambler there was the target of their thievery. The Phantom Troupe usually went for much bigger points than simply gamblers. But this casino in particular was different, or at least this time around, it was hosting an event that attracted some of the biggest pockets in the world and that's what caught The Troupe's attention. Illumi took this into account and planned for accessibility into the building itself. After everything was arranged he bought a suit, threw it on and headed out. 

"Well where are you going looking all fancy, Mr. Gittarackur? Meeting a special someone perhaps?" The man behind the front desk smiled and winked. He straightened out his own white collared shirt and rolled up the sleeves to his pink blazer.

Great.

Just at the moment he thought he'd finally gotten rid of annoying and prying men he just had to encounter another. "Just going to meet some business associates is all. Have a good day." Illumi nodded at the man and continued on, not giving him a second glance before heading out the door. 

Illumi's slick black hair swayed in the cool wind of the night and he went on his way to the casino. The entrance alone was heavily guarded with all different ranks of police and personal bodyguards, but Illumi was able to slip past them with little to no effort by coming in through a vent and blended in with hundreds of different faces and names. He aimlessly wandered up and down the velvet red carpets and golden drapes while he, carefully but not obviously, stalked the groups, singles and pairs of people gambling to their heart's content and joke or gossip about anything and everyone.

Before long he began to notice a few of the Spiders hiding in plain sight; Pakunoda was seen wiping down the counter at the bar near the entrance, Machi was watching over a game of Poker, Phinks was acting as a bodyguard near the stage, Shalnark was in the V.I.P loft area sipping on a drink with his phone in hand and Feitan was with Franklin walking up to the loft area. 

They already knew he was there. They had long since acknowledged his existence, but they either chose not to bother him or they were instructed not to. Regardless of who was told to do what, both parties were well aware of the other and Illumi still knew that the entire gang was in on whatever Chrollo had been keeping from him.

But where was he? Most likely somewhere close by. Maybe higher up in the building, away from the action of the casino and working behind the scenes with the other Troupe members Illumi did _not_ see while exploring the wide room. 

“Need a drink?” Pakunoda offered a tall glass filled with a peach colored liquid, an orange on the rim of the glass and a tiny umbrella sticking out from the beverage. “I was bored, so I thought why not make random flavors?” Illumi stared at the glass and declined the woman’s offer. “I do not plan on indulging such things.” Pakunoda lifted one of her thin eyebrows at the man then shrugged. “If you won’t drink it I will.” The woman stuck a straw in the glass and drank from it then looked back at Illumi. “Are you sure you don’t want anything?”

“I declined before, my answer remains the same.” 

The woman hummed and nodded. “I wasn’t gonna poison it or anything.” Pakunoda mumbled to herself as she continued to sip the rest of the drink through the colorful straw. 

Illumi could tell Pakunoda had a kind heart. She cared about her friends like they were blood, and with that she would risk her life for a friend. Because of this kind heart, as much as it was required for her to have a tough exterior, she looked at others in a kind and caring manner. But her kindness, compassion and love towards her friends and others would one day be her downfall. 

In Illumi’s eyes; he didn’t need friends. No one did, they would only be a point of use one or maybe a few more times but that would get old and he would only end up throwing them away. There was no point in having any in the first place only for them to be thrown out like everyone else who wasn’t family.

Friendship. Friendship was lying and putting a positive on everything, or a partnership when one person gains in the end. 

There was no need for it. If you can get it done yourself you don’t need friends.

“Hello, everyone! May I have your attention, please?” A loud, suave voice sounded throughout the entire room, blasting from the speakers and causing people to stop their activities and turn towards the massive stage with the same red velvet colored curtains as the carpet.

“I think you should take cover for a moment.” Pakunoda whispered to Illlumi and stepped further into the ‘employees only’ room. Illumi looked at the woman questionably but he slipped behind the bar and towards the door as well. 

“Yes, yes. Up here please! We have something important to announce to all of you!” Illumi didn’t turn back to look at the stage before walking into the open wooden door and shutting it behind himself. “We hope you’re enjoying your time here. From the workers of this establishment, to all of you, we would like to present you all with a gift!” The holder of the voice turned to Franklin and Feitan beside him and smiled. 

The audience leaned in, anxious to know what this gift was, but it wasn’t exactly what they were expecting. Loud bangs from machine guns sounded throughout the entirety of the lower level of the building, as well as the loft area. Guards and police came rushing in only to be caught in the crossfire. Illumi and Pakunoda had taken shelter from this in the locked employees room and with the loud bangs, screams and clashing of the war zone outside the door in front of them; the woman poured another drink and, once again, offered it to Illumi with the same kind hearted tone. 

“Need a drink?”

“Where’s your boss?” 

Pakunoda’s shoulders slumped as she sighed and she shook her head in disappointment. She was aware Chrollo and Illumi knew of each other and interacted at times, with Illumi’s deathly pale skin and dead eyes he reminded her of a vampire and never found a good way to approach him, but she never spoke to the man himself. She didn't know what she was expecting, but somehow he was everything and nothing she thought of. “So straight forward.” Pakunoda wryly smiled as she sat down on a wooden storage box. She crossed her legs and pulled at her black Khakis to straighten the wrinkles. Illumi silently watched Pakunoda’s movements as he waited for a proper response to his question. 

“Just wait.”

“For what?” The door swung open with a kick from an injured man with a disheveled suit, his white dress shirt was decorated with sprinkles and splashes of blood stains and bruises riddled his body. “Help me, please!” The man stumbled in the doorway. The outside noise seemed to have worsened, since the thunderous sounds of guns and ear-splitting screams were no longer muffled by the room door, it was slightly irritating. Pakunoda looked down at the man, trembling and sobbing on the floor, and frowned. With a loud bang the man’s crying was silenced and Pakunoda shoved him out of the room then closed the door, putting a few boxes in front of it. 

“For your answer.”

\---

When Pakunoda informed him that she was told to send him to a specific location as a favor for one of the gang members Illumi got suspicious. He wasn’t anywhere near being close to any of the members, besides the leader himself who he considered a business associate, why would any of them request to meet him in the first place? It’s safe to say he wasn’t expecting the ‘gang member’ to be the man he decapitated a week before.

“I snapped your neck and fed you to pigs.” Hisoka sipped the coffee from his mug, made a disgusted expression at the taste, and reached for a sugar packet on the side of the table. “Yes, darling, you did.” He delicately stirred the sugar into the liquid, took another sip and smiled. “Perfect.” 

“How are you alive?” Hisoka pursed his lips and lifted his eyebrows like he was surprised Illumi would ask such a question. “Oh.” He popped his lips. “I told you I didn’t plan on dying yet-I said that, didn’t I?” Hisoka took another sip from his coffee while still looking at Illumi with a ‘told you so’ expression. “That still doesn’t explain _how_ you are alive.” How did he do it? Hisoka smiled at him and continued to drink his coffee. 

“You look at me as if you despise my very existence.” Hisoka blinked at the man glaring so intensely it reached his soul. “I do.”

“Okay!” Hisoka sang. “Whatever you say darling.” 

\---

After Hisoka took an unnecessary long amount of time eating a pastry, the two left the café and walked down an empty road with boarded up buildings standing sadly behind the sidewalks. The streetlights were worn out and fading in their light and the wind was warm and swift, adding with the dark clouds in the sky it was a sign a storm would be coming soon. “Did you take me here to kill me?” Illumi asked in his usual monotone voice. “That’s not what I want, darling. For now interacting with you is quite interesting.” He smiled, but Illumi didn’t think to look over the ‘For now’ part and stayed cautious of the man. 

“Pakunoda said she told me to go to the café as a favor to one of the Troupe members.” 

“Yes.” Hisoka nodded. “How long have you been with the Spiders?” Illumi kept his guard up while he strayed a few steps behind Hisoka as he stilled for a moment then looked back at Illumi. “Not too long before we met, dear.” He turned his head back around and continued to walk down the sidewalk, where were they going in the first place? Where did this abandoned town lead to? “A few weeks before at most.” So when he told Illumi he ‘did his research’ he most likely found out about Illumi from Chrollo. Was that the reason he was in Meteor City? That would mean Chrollo was aware he would come to get information from him and would also add to why the Troupe knew of his presence at the casino, they might have known he was coming before _he_ knew he was coming. How big was this secret, that Chrollo had Hisoka take him to Yorknew without him knowing? Illumi could’ve met any random person to show him the way to Yorknew, but Chrollo sent one of his members, why? Were they being watched? That made sense.

“We’re here!” Hisoka smiled and gestured to Illumi to walk with him through an open warehouse door. It was obviously abandoned a long time ago, along with the rest of the small town within the city, it’s walls were rusted and old dirty banners were hanging on by one screw. “Lovely place, isn’t it?” Hisoka noticed Illumi looking around the entrance questionably. “Just wait until you see the inside.” He pointed inside the warehouse and walked through the entrance. Illumi followed him cautiously, watching his surroundings. 

“Illumi, it’s been a while.” Machi came into sight standing on a wooden box with her arms crossed and naturally irritated facial expression. Illumi watched the rest of the Troupe sitting around the middle of the large empty area. “You still freak me out.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise, clown man is alive and sassy. Hope you enjoyed this I don't know when I'll post the next chapter but it'll happen. This was also shorter than I thought it would be.
> 
> Thanks for reading.

**Author's Note:**

> It took awhile to realize how to properly function on this. Anyway this is my first time publishing on ao3 and a Hunter x Hunter fic so first time for everything I guess. I've already got the second chapter completed so I'll probably post it in two days just to see how people react to it. Like I said before this whole thing is just me trying out different types of characters but I'm having fun so eh. By the third chapter I want to have a normal schedule so that might happen. 
> 
> Uuhhhh anyway see ya


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